Posts Tagged ‘Forgiveness’


With the news circulating the story regarding the murder of Botham Jean from 2018, the court case has been sharply examined with Amber Gutter being the murderer she was of doing the job. We know this so well and all the drama that went along with it. It’s been a year of heartache and distress. And us in the black community, we are known to let this slide and branch out. Yet its still another day to conquer.

But I want to take a moment to discuss is the subject of forgiveness. Oh let’s go there. This whole thing about Botham Jean’s youngest brother hugging Amber Guyger has really upset the entire Black Community after the footage that has escalated the masses of commentary. And that same commentary was not very liked. 10 times over, it was not liked nor appreciastd of what was learned in a place that many black folks have not or will not go on sundays. Yep I’m talking about Church. It seems that the issue of Christianity has once again has hit the folks and many had bashed Botham Jean’s Brother in the thought of him hugging the woman who murdered his older brother in 2018. And he, asked the judge if it’s alright to hug her. He did. And not only that, the judge hugged her also, whom is BLACK! And now many are questioning or commenting that oh, he’s bowing down to his oppressor, and or it’s being brainwashed of him hugging her due to the mental slavery mentality. Don’t believe me? Look at your Social Media folks, WHO DON’T GO TO CHURCH, NOR NOT WANTS TO GO! They were all over this like white on rice. Look at those who write these opinionated thoughts about religion and haven’t have a darn clue of the positive side of things, rather they want to rant about the negative angles. I said it before and I’ll say it again, there are good and bad in all things! Look at your jobs, your clubs, your recent class reunions, or some sort of organized atmosphere and yes even though that the NFL and NCAA are celebrating milestones this year of 100 and 150 with the throwback jerseys and uniforms. But those whom wore the originals, wore them at a time when there were no black folks playing Football and to bust down barriers of hate just to play on the gridiron. And all of this was way before Colin Kaepernick was even thought about!

CALLOUT: Since when, just when the word or action of forgiveness has become the thing of being bad? Since when the word forgiveness is or had become the thought of being an enemy of the people? Yes, we all even if you had gone atheist claiming there is no God, but we all had to draw a thought to get the subject of forgiveness as an understanding of getting things out and admitting the faults or mistakes. That is the true thought of ideas. It’s not to make you look like a wussy.

Ask yourself, how many of you reading my blog or past blog stories had ever asked to be forgiven or had been asked by others to forgive? Be honest. And I know you have been asking in a sense, “when was Stephen was forgiven of anything, or had Stephen accepted a forgiveness angle of someone that had hurt him? No matter when it was, where it was, and how it was. No matter if it was in church, or school, or even in the family?” You know what, I had folks telling me “I’m Sorry.” Or I had told folks, I’m Sorry. But I also had folks telling me that saying sorry is not enough. I had folks telling me I’m sorry of the crap they did to me, but I have NOT forgiven them. Oh……I know what you’re thinking. “Dude you go to church every Sunday, in that building for 2 hours doing your thing with your members, and you on here telling folks that other people hating on you for some stuff and you have NOT forgiven them?” And oh…..here comes a trying question: “What kind of God you serve?”

Oh, ok. So many of you probably think that if I don’t forgive a person that make me a bad guy? Is that what God is expected of me? The kind of God I serve, is a everlasting forgiving, and fearful God that is far more superior than folks who hate on Church. No matter what my stats or my interests are. No matter what I have done wrong or done right, nor matter if I worked a little or volunteered alot. Even though I may not a perfect person growing up in Milwaukee, Wisconsin the very same Milwaukee that many black folks have dubbed as “the most segregated city in the United States”, have a little menial job of a Church Secretary, or having 2 college degrees, active in my community for my Church and Alumni, and wants a challenge in life in my 40’s with dealing the fact of Type Two Diabetes in session that I did not ask to come into my life, I said it before and I’ll say it now, I am not perfect. If the folks did me wrong so bad, and I have said it million times on this blog, I’m holding folks accountable. Doesn’t matter how long it takes. I’m not able to send out the “I accept your apologies” yet. Nope, that is way too easy. I want that person or persons to be held accountable of what was transpired and to accept the fact they were wrong period. No matter if they were BLACK OR WHITE! No matter if they’re Baby Boomers, Generation X, and Z, and the Millennial folks. Yes I’m putting all of that on blast because now a days, many want to simply forget and move on. Yes we really want to forget and move on, but I say: NEVER FORGET! Where did I heard those words from? Everytime when the issue of the holocaust comes up, the Jewish folks always says, never forget. When 9/11 or any other anniversary act of danger is being remembered, we all say never forget. But when the issue of slavery comes up, we black folks had these words scripted so many times: Get over it. Yeah, follow that. Oprah Winfrey asked Michael Jackson on his interview back in 1993 this one question: “Can you really forgive?” Like Barack Obama once said in his presidency, “Hold me accountable”. He was real when he said it. But for what I said earlier, it depends on the issue and the later stances of that person(s) at fault.

From the article of CNN.com:

It’s part of their Christian faith
Forgiveness is mentioned many times in the Bible and is a pinnacle of the Christian faith.
“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you,” reads Ephesians 4:32. Another verse, Matthew 6:14, goes further: “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.”
These sentiments of forgiveness are reiterated again and again throughout the Bible, and Botham’s family is quite acquainted with this Christian tradition. Like his brother, Brandt was raised in the Church of Christ in St. Lucia, where his family lives. His mother, Allison Jean, gave all of her three children Biblical middle names. Botham Jean’s middle name was Shem, who was a son of Noah. Brandt’s middle name is Samuel, after a prophet in the Old Testament.

Let’s be honest, forgiveness is hard to accept. It’s truly hard. It’s not easy. It’s not simple. Every time when we church folks take communion every 1st Sunday of the month, we read a passage from our hymnals that deal with the words: “In the name of Jesus Christ, you are forgiven!” And many of us repeat the words to one another and say the same thing. Many of us had prayers in circles that we ask God for forgiveness no matter what act of intent was done. No matter if it was taken out of context or whatever. Hear me when I say and everyone knows: GOD KNOWS ALL! How many of us who ever been bullied in school NEVER FORGAVE anyone that tormented you all those years? How many of us got bullied on the job, in a club, organizations, and many others that never EVER FORGAVE that person or persons for what they have done? (Male or Female) How many of us NEVER FORGAVE that pastor, church member, or that fraternity/sorority member, or supporter or leader, or any other person not mentioning that still burns your blood even to this very day, and DOES NOT DESERVE any type of forgiveness? Now we are getting somewhere! Yeah, lets go folks. It’s go time! As a matter of fact, I brought this up before on this blog years back.

Now getting back to Amber Guyger who is about to be in jail for 10 years killing Botham Jean in his Apartment in Texas by minding his own business, was the central point of the incident. And Botham Jean’s Brother, Brandt gave her a hug that many felt was a trap for White Supremacy. Brandt is 18 years old. He’s young. And yet, he’ll have alot to learn in his later years about being black and being questioned about his faith and beliefs in regarding his hug on Amber Guyger. His mother, meanwhile commented that his son did his honorable thing, but also commented via her husband that “it may have consequences”. Uh-Oh! That is part many need to know in this subject. Even I didn’t expect this. Part of this is the truth, whether we admit it or not. So where do I stand in all this? Well, it’s on pins and needles. Part of me is saying, I don’t know about this one. The woman again shot an innocent bystander in his apartment for God’s sake and we should let this go? I know that we are supposed to forgive, but the act needs to be in question. Many might forgive the person of Amber Guyger, but many darn sure will not forgive of forget the act of crimes that was committed against Botham Jean by allowing her to kill a black man in his own home. And to follow up, Botham Jean’s life did indeed matter.

And also, the struggle continues! This however, is not over. So, in this case don’t go burying the hatchet yet. And make sure that person and you come together and actually work out the details to move forward. If it doesn’t happen, there is no deal. However, if there is a deal and if there is a part to be sure, then make that decision.